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Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Bubbles, Momo, Momo's Mama and the 20 week ultrasound. . .

I have been getting lots of angry emails about my posting habits (or lack thereof) so I thought I would combine a few posts into one.  So here goes:  

"Auntie" Bubbles (see prior post) came for a visit last week.   We couldn't wait to see her.  For years I have been referred to as Bubbles' "Second Husband" or her "Gay Husband".   Bubbles says "the role of the Second husband is to take care of me if anything ever happens to Fly Daddy" (see prior post).   That seems fair enough except Bubbles has a very nice life!!  Fly Daddy takes really really good care of her .  Needless to say, I am praying nothing ever happens to Fly Daddy not only because we love him too but because with three babies to care for I 'm not sure I can keep Bubbles in the lifestyle to which she has become very very accustomed.....   We always have fun with Bubbles (and lot's of champagne) when she is here and this trip was no exception.   In fact, Bubbles started her trip with a pub crawl in her local airport and by the time she landed, she was on a roll!   It didn't hurt that she was traveling with her friend (a mom with 3 boys under the age of 4) who knows how to appreciate her time away!    Since Jim had a business meeting, Bubbles and I went out to dinner.  We started talking about the babies and before you knew it we both started crying.  Oh Gawd, not a public cry!  And it wasn't a pretty cry either...I mean, c'mon, Bubbles had mascara rolling down her face in the middle of the freaking restaurant!  After we collected ourselves, we started laughing because we overheard the ladies next to us comment that 'we must be having marital problems!'   I just knew at any moment Bubbles was going to lean over and say "Oh we're having marital problems alright because my husband here is Gay and is now having triplets with his Husband!"   Ha!   That was just one of the many stories we had with Bubbles during her week here shopping for the babies, crying about the babies, having boozy lunches, more shopping for the babies, more crying and more boozy lunches.   Although we can do without the crying, we can't wait for Bubbles to come back and visit us!

We also had our 20 week ultrasound last week and everything looked good.   I think we scared the technician with all the people we had in tow.   Of course Bubbles cried within minutes of seeing 'her babies' for the first time....although it was a pretty cry this time.   Morgan, who is affectionately called "Momo" by her nephews,  looked great!  She looked so cute in her maternity dress.....and we just can't get over that baby belly!   We think the name "Momo" is perfect for her and we hope she let's the jelly beans and peanut call her Momo too.  Morgan's Mama came to the appointment and got to see the babies for the first time too.  We had actually met Momo's Mama last week when we surprised her by showing up at David's Bridal while she was shopping for her other daughter's wedding.   I walked up behind her and told her that I didn't think that color was right for her!   HA  It was like a bad ambush reality a cross between "Queer Eye" and "Say Yes to the Dress".  Well she gave me a look that I will never forget.   Like she thought we were some bad wedding stylists there to ruin her good time.  Her look even caused Jim to hide behind a row of wedding dresses thinking I had the wrong woman!  After a little back/forth, we all had a good laugh after we told her that we were the ones that got her daughter pregnant!  We also got to meet Momo's younger sisters (twins) who couldn't have been more sweet.  Although Jim and I were nervous at first, we fell in love with the whole family immediately.  They have truly embraced us and it feels great.   Since Momo's Mama carried twins herself, she knows a thing or two about multiples.  It was great having her at the ultrasound and  it was cute when Morgan told her mom that she had 'one upped' her with carrying triplets!   Speaking of the trips, they are about a pound each and all are growing at the same rate/size  The jelly beans (A and )B are head down and peanut (C) is head up.  

Morgan is really starting to feel them all kick and move now which makes this all the more real for Jim and I.   This week we say Thank You to Bubbles, Momo, Momo's Mama and the rest of her family for all they have done for us.  Without them, we wouldn't be enjoying this process as much as we have been and because of them, all is good in triplet world.

Until next time.... 

Friday, July 8, 2011

Grandma. . .

Of the many changes a pregnancy can bring, one is the new relationship you begin to have with your family. Taking on the role of a father brings a new sense of appreciation for your parents and all that they did for you growing up. To that end, my mom and I have become much much closer since she found out that we were having a baby (triplets about sent her over the edge...but that's another story).   I suppose that she had all but given up on the idea that she would have grandchildren from me so the minute she found out about our family, "Grandma" kicked into high gear!!!

You see, shortly after we told her our news, we received the following in the mail:

Mom made the burp pads in the back right.

Then, a couple of weeks later, we received this:

If that weren't enough, we received this a few weeks after that:

She made the 3 quilts in the front and all the receiving blankets in the back!

Mom said: "Well, I just couldn't resist. Kohl's has their Senior Citizen Discount on Wednesdays and they were also having a huge baby I just picked up a few things for the babies!" Ha! A FEW things? I love my mom and her generosity knows no end but our kids are going to be spoiled by her definition of a 'few'! Ha! I don't know if she learned this as a way of survival growing up with 7 brothers and sisters (she was next to the youngest)! or whether she learned to stock up in "Mom School", but either way, we have never been without. My mom is always one to plan ahead to make sure that the family has what they need and she is always there in any way she can to help so it’s no surprise that she is there for us as we prepare to become dads.

Jim and I worried (see former blog post) about whether it was right for two men to have kids. After some real soul searching, we came to the conclusion that all kids really need is Love. We have plenty of love to give....and, from the looks of it, our kids have a Grandma who already loves them as much as we do. Jim lost his mother a little over a year ago. We can't help but think she too would have been right there with my mom…. buying at Kohls on Wednesday's and sending her treasures our way.

Thank God for Grandmas and Thank God for Mom's.....ours have taught us a lot about compassion, commitment, understanding and most of all "Love". For that we are extremely grateful and humbled.... Thank you Grandma. . .

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Recap: Triplet Boot Camp.... Wow, where to start….

Part of the fun of being pregnant is getting to share the news with people.  The fun is more than just sharing our excitement, but also watching their reaction after announcing that “we’re pregnant!....with triplets!”.   Their face typically turns from joy to shock/horror.  Should we be scared?  What do they know that we don’t?    Their fear is likely the same as ours…. the unknown.   What better way to calm those fears (in theory) than to spend a day in the shoes of triplet parents.  And so began the concept of Triplet Boot Camp.
JR and I were invited by parents (“M” and “A”) of 10mo old triplet girls last Saturday to work and learn.  We arrived bearing coffee/pastries at 8:30am and within minutes were on the floor with their girls.  Our first lesson was “stranger anxiety” as the girls were trying to figure out who these strange guys/novices were.  Seriously, was it that obvious?   They decided to put us through our first test:  a chorus of crying and some spit up.  We managed to stumble through the test and all eventually calmed down (the babies did too).  Ok, that wasn’t so difficult.   Lesson #1:   Remain calm and confident.  Babies can & will sense your fear.
Next was putting them down for their 10am nap:  checking diapers, zipping into sleeping sacks, starting the white noise on the Ipod.  No fussing?  That was too easy.  Can’t imagine all 10mo old infants go down that easy.  Was it beginners luck, excellent parenting or just sweet natured babies?    I think it’s a combination of all the above.  All I know is that I hope ours will be as easy.  Lesson #1002:   Love a sleep sack.  Wonder if they come in my size (oh yeah, it’s called a Snuggie)
Getting to know “M” and “A” was awesome.   We have so much in common (other than just triplets).  What struck me was how easy they made parenting look.  Triplets are often referred to as “super twins”, which I guess infers they are the offspring of super parents.  Or perhaps it takes a super parent to raise them.  All I know is that these super daddies have it figured out; from strict scheduling to homemade baby food & wipes.  To video monitors, triple eating table (brilliant!), and all the priceless time to spend with their babies.   Lesson # 1208:  We have LOTS to learn from them.
After spending some time getting to know each other, baby duty started back at 11:30 by getting them up from their nap and changing my first diaper.!!! (Not sure why everyone is surprised that I’ve never changed a diaper until this very moment.)   My baby was calm and patient, staring at the mobile while I stumbled thru a FULL diaper (thank you sweetie), wipes, diaper cream, and wrapping a tight-ish diaper.  It wasn’t my best work but it should hold a blowout.  Lesson #1498:  With girls, wipe front to back. 
Next, the girls were fed lunch.   The babies are fed in a triple high chair of sorts.  Picture a Formica table with adjustable legs, 3 cutouts in the table top with drop-in seats, all facing the same direction.  We slid the babies into their seats and watched them get ready to eat (OMG how adorable).   “A” was amazing,  giving each a generous helping of puréed vegetables and praising the girls for a job well done.   Very good eaters and good sleepers… maybe these really are super  twins!  Again, couldn’t help but hope ours will be the same.   Lesson #1765:  Homemade baby food is found online but I think “A” has a second career coming with a baby cookbook!
With the babies fed and dressed, it was now time for the daddies to have lunch…in town!  WHAT?   We are leaving the house???  OMG!   So off we went strapping the triple stroller to the top of the SUV, 3 stroller seats inside the SUV, 3 babies into their car seats, (all while keeping cool  in the 100+ temps).   A true production, but manageable (we could do this! maybe).  The real production is the amount of attention that 3 babies get in public!   Of course who couldn’t resist three adorable babies dressed in matching pretty dresses??  Once settled at the table in their high chairs, the girls (all of 9+ months old) were absolute angels (yes, they must definitely be super twins).  I was amazed at this to say the least but I was more surprised by the forwardness of passers-by who could not help themselves from questions & comments.  Don’t get me wrong, it was all very sweet and positive.  These weren’t even my children but I was totally proud to be associated with them.  Although felt bad for “M” and “A” who could barely finish a bite before fielding another question.   Lesson#2155:  Patience is critical:  Not only for the babies but for the well-meaning public as well. 
Once back at home, we unload the babies from the SUV, then unload the diapers before going down for their next nap (sounded like a good idea for me also, but I digress…).  We talked about what happens after they’re born, the NICU, night nurse / doula for the first few months, then a nanny going forward.  The more time we spent with the triplets and their parents, the more confident we became that we could manage our own.  The unknown is becoming more familiar.  Lesson #3225:  Three babies at once ARE doable if you have the right attitude and the cooperation of your partner.  I think we have both.
Before we knew it, it was dinner time!   JR and I feel like pros by now.  Little instruction needed as we get the babies up, changed, and into their feeding table.  The girls loved eating pureed broccoli and salmon.   JR feeds, I wipe faces.   Lesson #4731:  Teamwork is critical (as is “A”’s recipe for broccoli-salmon!)
After dinner we all had swim time!   Outfit change into swim diapers (who knew?) and THE most adorable 2 piece bathing suits (well, just the girls as JR forgot his two piece) completed the package.  The girls have been taking swim lessons and anxious to show off their skills like floating on their back followed by a roll under water.  Yep, these girls have skills!
Bath time was next.  Now, this activity is an assembly line.  With spa music in the background, each baby gets special attention from bath to lotion from “A” and “M” (amazing to see) before their last bottle of the day.   While I get comfortable in the glider (nice!) with one of my 3 new bff’s, the lights are turned down and the music turns soft.   A beautiful quiet comes over the room.  Just “M”,”A”,  JR and I with 3 of the most adorable children I have ever had the privilege of getting to know.   It was truly a beautiful/emotional end to a wonderful day.  Bottles are done, babies are burped, sleep sack, white noise for the night and before you know it, Boot Camp is done.   NO!   I wanna spend more time with the girls!!!  Lesson #6798:  The days will go by quickly (as with their growing up) so cherish each day on its own.  
Though we were strangers at first, as the day wore on the smiles got a little wider and the hugs got a little tighter  and the laughs got a little louder (and I’m not just referring to the girls).  We completely  fell in love with that family that day and we missed them the next.  People often say that taking care of children is a lot of work.  That may be true.   But if JR and I can work as a team like “M” and “A”, the work will be manageable and the payoff will be WAY worth it. 
Lesson # 9209:  We went into this weekend hoping to learn how to take care of triplets but what we came away with was an experience we will never forget, friends we hope to have for a lifetime and the knowledge that our children will change our lives in ways we never expected…..And We Can’t wait!